Magnificent Alligator Kicks like BOSS

Look at these fabulous b@stards! Shaped like Converse, but with g0ddamn ALLIGATORS on the side, so you know they're much more badass than Chuck Taylors. Chuck only wishes he could be this cool. One of the tiny alligators even has a slight bend in its tail section, probably from getting in a tussle with several tyrannosaurus rexes and WINNING. That's how hardass these shoes are. I wore them a couple times, but got tired of people assuming I was a cross between The Rock and James Dean and trying to start fights. That got tiresome, but your mileage may vary. Brand is Lacoste, which I think is French for LOOK AT THIS ALLIGATOR SACRE BLEU! Size 9.5 men's US, 42.5 EUR.